Rohanism

Rohan is playing Legos.  I'm trying to fix my blasted printer that suddenly decides it's not going to "communicate" with my computer.  (Yessss, I love technology.  But not as much as you, you see.  But sssstill I love technology.  Alwaysss and forever.  Alwaysss and forever.) 

Anyway, Rohan is quietly playing with our cubic yard of Legos and he says to me, "Mom?  Does Jesus live on a dead planet?"

I'm thinkin' to myself, 'What the...???'

I reply, "Ummm, no?"

Rohan says, "Well all the people that live there are dead."

"Ohhhh..." I say.  I'm sorta following his train of thought now. 

Rohan... "Does it take a long time to float up there?  To Jesus?  When you're a ghost?"

Fortunately for me, he's not looking at my face at this point because how can you not smile when  you're having a conversation like this? 

My reply: "I don't know, honey.  I've never died."

His mind chews on that for a minute.  "But when you die, Mom, maybe you'll tell me?"



I love that child.  So much.

Rohan

I was reading a blog of my friend Corrinne today about what she does all day as a mother.  I was engrossed and not paying attention to what Rohan, who was sitting on my lap, was saying to me.  (He talks a LOT and sometimes I tune him out)  Involved in my reading as I was, I finally tuned back in when he touched my cheek to turn my face toward his, raised the decibel of his voice and said, very sternly, "IS. THAT. CLEAR. ??"

(I, apparently, say that enough to my kids that he's parroting it back to me.  Awesome.)

This got my attention CLEARLY, and I asked him to repeat what he said.

"Mommy.  Will. You. Get. New. Batt. Er. Ies. In. My. Mote. Con. Trol. Car."

(Translation: Mommy, will you get new batteries in my remote control car?)

And then, once again, "IS. THAT. CLEAR?"

I laughed.  "Yes, that's clear, son.  Now ask me nicely."

He did and followed his now-nice request by yelling suddenly, "I need to get dressed!"

"Yes, you do," I replied.

He went to his clothes basket and found his clothes.  As he was putting on his shirt he said, "This shirt smells like stinky food."  I stifled a laugh (as I do so often around this child) and told him to put on another shirt.

"But I like this one, Mom!"  he responded.

"Well, then," I said, "Wear the shirt that smells like stinky food!"

He just giggled.

And so did I.

And... he's still wearing the shirt.

Logic...

My kids and I were eating lunch around our table yesterday and we were talking about a guy named Cliff that we know. Ella said, "Who's Cliff?"

Mac replied, "You know Uncle Dave? Cliff is Uncle Dave's brother." (Uncle Dave is, in fact, my uncle, married to my mom's sister)

Ella's face was still blank. "Who's Uncle Dave again?" and even as she said that, you could see the wheels turning and see her remember who Uncle Dave was (because we see him a lot and she definitely knows who he is...). It all clicked for her just as Mac said, rather incredulously, "YOU KNOW who Uncle Dave is!! He's our uncle, silly!"

They got it all sorted out and, because they are now old enough to grasp such concepts, I added that Uncle Dave is actually not their uncle, but my uncle making him their GREAT Uncle. At this revelation, Ella, who had just figured it all out, looked at me like I pulled the rug out from under her. "He's our Great Uncle?" she replied and with her cutest little shocked, dramatic, Ella-voice she said, "Then why isn't he dead!!!??"

I totally busted up laughing. The logic of my seven-year old Ella... all the "Greats" are dead in her mind!

Rohan...

This morning I woke up to Rohan climbing up beside me in bed. A conversation began...

Rohan- "Mommy, where's Daddy?"

Mom- "He's at karate."

R- "Oh."

...pause...

R- "Mommy, can you get me some cereal?"

M- "Do you need to go pee?"

R- "OH YEAH!!!" and as he walks off to go potty I say,

M- "You go pee and then I'll get you cereal."

R- "Yes, Commander."

M- "Did you say, 'Yes Commander?"

R- "Yes, Commander Mommy."

Stifling laughs, I think to myself, 'Commander Mommy'... I like it!! Then, as he's walking further he says, more to himself than me,

R- "Yes, Commander Karate Kid."

(Commander Karate Kid would be Dustin)




After the potty trip was finished he comes back and lays by me.

R- "Mommy... I really want to see inside Karate Kid."

Umm... what? I think to myself.

R Repeats- "Mommy... I really want to see inside Karate Kid."

I rack my brain a little bit. Karate Kid is what Rohan calls Dustin's karate. For example, if Dustin is wearing his Gi (the white karate outfit), Rohan will say, "Dad, you goin' to Karate Kid?" So, after I come up with that train of thought I apply it to "seeing inside Karate Kid"...

M- "You want to see the place where Daddy does karate?"

R- "Yes! I want to see inside Daddy's Karate Kid!"

M- "Honey, Daddy just does karate at Grandpa's church and you've already been there."

He now looks rather confused...

R- "At Grandpa's church?"

M- "Yep, at Grandpa's church building."

R- "Oh."

And he walks off very satisfied because he, indeed, has already seen inside "Karate Kid".


I love Rohan.