Thursday, December 17, 2009

Where Did We Go Wrong?

Dear Peanut Butter-

It's not you, it's me.

I'm not sure what happened to us.  We used to enjoy eachother's company.  I've never been a "I can't get enough peanut butter" kind of person, but we've always gotten along just fine. 

Something happened.  Over the years, you've just lost something.  Slowly, you and I have just drifted apart.  Remember when I used to put a normal amount of you on my PBJ's?  And then that amount got thinner and thinner as the years passed, when finally the bread would just show right through you as I spread you on with my favorite freezer jam.  I would almost gag if I watched my husband make a PBJ.  He lays you on so thick, I'm amazed he coul speak the rest of the day after he ate those sandwiches.  

At first it was just the thinning of the "PB" in my PBJ.  Next was the Reese's Peanut Butter cups.  And somewhere between the Reese's and last night's Peanut Butter Bar order that I had to fill, we've become nothing short of enemies.  You assault all my senses... smell, sight, taste... even touch.  So far, you've stayed away from hearing, but I know you'll find a way to ruin that too. 

I want to be friends with you!  Can't we still be friends?  It would be so much easier to be around you! 

Can't you just make yourself smell good to me again?  Or, make it so that when I find little remnants of you in the jelly or the butter (because my kids don't understand the strength of my aversion toward you!) I don't go ballistic? 


I'm so sorry that it's come to this.  Perhaps, when my hormones level off in a few months, we can find some sort of happy medium.  Perhaps. 

No longer yours,
Clancy

3 comments:

Elena said...

So funny! I couldn't get enough peanut butter when I was pregnant. And pb Capt. Crunch...oh my...I would probably eat 5 bowls a day of that stuff. The thing that I can't eat anymore is vanilla flavoring. Started in my 4th pregancy and to this day I gag a little when I taste it. It tastes like a cleaning chemical to me now. So strange. Hope your aversion goes away when you're no longer with child. :)

Corinne said...

I love peanut butter too, it is so sad when our hormones won't let us do what we want! I hope that you and pb can work out a compromise!

Brecca said...

I've never liked peanut butter and I love the way you put it "assault all my senses...smell, sight, taste and touch. My family eats it and I hate peanut butter breath. Thanks for sharing!