Friday, August 8, 2008

Batteries Not Included

Batteries are my nemesis. They are a thorn in my side or a stone in my shoe that, at times, as a nemesis sometimes does, can defeat me. Surely, they are a wonder and bless our lives in countless ways, and I am grateful for them. But batteries reveal certain weaknesses in me.

This weakness might stem from my growing up years. I might just be repeating patterns, but I can't remember clearly enough. Seems like, to my vague recollections, I grew up with a battery problem. In my house, double A's were an endangered species. Triple A's were on the verge of decimation. D's might as well have been extinct. While C's were nothing more than a myth. Let's not even talk about 9 volt...

Some of you may be asking the question, "What the #@!$ is she talking about!?" I will explain. It seems like I always need batteries, and it seems as though I never have any in my house. As a kid, if the batteries died in a toy or a clock or a flashlight, you might as well just kiss it goodbye. Throw it in the trash. Never mind that it is a perfectly good item, sans batteries. They just never got replaced. I remember holding onto things, like an RC car, for years thinking we'd get batteries for it "one of these days", but no... we never did. Eventually these things always got taken to the goodwill.

I have gotten a little better in my adult years. I try to be a little more responsible. I buy the super-mega-huge pack of double A's at Sam's Club and that helps. I have some rechargeable for my camera and our Wii remotes. These are steps in the right direction, but the problem still exists for the triple A's, the D's, the C's and the 9 volts.

For example: Dustin gave me a book light when Mac was a brand new baby. It requires "C" batteries, which he gave me with the light. I am an avid reader and the batteries died after a while. I've held on to the stupid thing for eight years thinking I'll get batteries for it. Hasn't happened yet. Sad, but true.

If my kids have a toy that requires a battery, I cross my fingers that it's double A, cuz otherwise it's trash fodder as far as I'm concerned.

I'm not sure if the weakness lies in the not remembering to purchase them or the tightwad's reluctance to fork out the cash. Probably both. Either way the toys, flashlights, watches, clocks, remote controls, and cheap electric toothbrushes of the world suffer at my residence because I, simply, have a battery problem.


Kaci said...

LOL!! Oh yes I think it's a parent thing cause this was true when I was growing up as well!! And I have a book light too that my daughter thought it was a far better toy for her then for Mommy to actually use! :)

Kristin said...

LOL!!! This is hilarious! Maybe I'll have to send you some "C" batteries as a gift and thank you for coming to my mom's funeral. Poor thing! I don't have D's, I don't think, but the 9 Volts are required for our smoke detectors (I think). Plus, I'm not a very good tightwad (I try).

BTW - Just finished listening to your G-ma and Aunt sing... I like the third one best too... still think it's so great that you have their voices recorded.

bv said...

I love your words! You have to many talents!!!

My Dad was and remains the battery king of the world! I try to keep up but at least now I know what to send you for your b day!!!

Anonymous said...

We were plagued with a "battery gremlin" at our home on Linden Drive. He was a little red animal that devoured all the game boy batteries. We even wrote a book about it as a family. It was a hoot.

polly said...

My biggest problem is small cell batteries...they go in watches, baby dolls, even my book light...which is why I haven't used mine in forever! I'd rather buy the kids a new 10 dollar watch (or even 20 sometimes) than try to find the right size cell and try to get it in that watch.