Just in case any of you were wondering...
1- As many of you know, touching your mascara brush to your eyeball hurts and make your eye water. It is now known that jabbing it into the bottom of your iris hurts a lot more and makes your eye water buckets.
2- Jabbing instead of touching can leave a dime sized smear of mascara on your eyeball. It is very messy and very hard not to blink while you try to wipe it off.
3- When you jab or even stab your mascara brush into your iris you can look in the mirror and discover holes in your cornea. When you mention this fact to someone like your sister, she might look in your eyes and say, "Yep, you did! And you've got mascara embedded in the holes!"
4- Mascara embedded in your cornea is rather irritating. It continues to make your eye water buckets. It also causes concern from those who love you and they might suggest you go to the eye doctor.
5- Going to the eye doctor is not an easy task on a Saturday evening around 7:00. Most of them are closed.
6- Three words. Wal-Mart Vision Center. (is Wal-Mart one word?)
7- It is possible for all Wal-Mart optometrists to be at a convention somewhere far away ALL at the SAME time!
8- It is also possible for Wal-Mart optometrists to get substitute optometrists if they are good friends with them, for which, people might be VERY grateful.
9- There are drops that numb your eye so that you can be like Woody in Toy Story 2 where a Q-Tip can slowly come toward your eyeball and look bigger the closer it comes. Then you can watch it scrub round and round on your eyeball, just like Woody.
10- Substitute Wal-Mart optometrists are very nice. They might just give you their home and cell phone number in case you have any questions and it's the weekend.
11- Scrubbing on your eyeball makes your eyeball not very comfortable once the numb drops wear off.
12- Wal-Mart's pharmacy is closed at 8:00 on a Saturday night.
13- Harmon's pharmacy isn't.
14- When you get your eyeball scrubbed, sleep is a good thing.
15- Your eyes don't open in the morning when your eyelashes are stuck together.
16- Sunshine is brutal on scrubbed eyeballs.
17- So is wind.
18- There are very nice people in the world who will step in and lead a choir for Stake Conference when your eyeball has been scrubbed and it waters buckets and stings so bad you can't open it.
19- There are eye drops that are actually a gel that feel really good on scrubbed eyeballs.
20- Eyeballs heal really fast, and can feel a lot better just twenty-four hours later.
21- Eyeballs hurt to be scrubbed, but given a choice, this girl would take that over Torticollis any day!